Back when gas was cheap, rent was reasonable, and a Burger King paycheck could keep two roofs over your head—you didn’t just dream about a secret family, you could fund one. The Bring Back Affordable Secret Families tee is a satirical gut-punch to today’s broke economy, where even one family feels like a financial hostage situation.

This shirt is for degenerates, nostalgics, and anyone who misses the golden age of lies, late-night alibis, and supporting kids who didn’t even know they were siblings. It’s not just a shirt—it’s a eulogy for minimum wage’s glory days.

Specs:

100% premium ring-spun cotton strong enough to handle all your dirty laundry.

Bold print that screams louder than divorce court.

Unisex fit, because financial infidelity used to be for everyone.

You've now found the staple t-shirt of your wardrobe. It's made of 100% ring-spun cotton and is soft and comfy. The double stitching on the neckline and sleeves add more durability to what is sure to be a favorite!  

• 100% ring-spun cotton
• Sport Grey is 90% ring-spun cotton, 10% polyester
• Dark Heather is 65% polyester, 35% cotton
• 4.5 oz/yd² (153 g/m²)
• Shoulder-to-shoulder taping
• Quarter-turned to avoid crease down the center
• Blank product sourced from Bangladesh, Nicaragua, Honduras, Dominican Republic, Haiti or Guatemala

Disclaimer: Due to the fabric properties, the White color variant may appear off-white rather than bright white.

Age restrictions: For adults
EU Warranty: 2 years
Other compliance information: Meets the flammability, lead, cadmium, phthalates and formaldehyde level requirements.

In compliance with the General Product Safety Regulation (GPSR), Oak inc. and SINDEN VENTURES LIMITED ensure that all consumer products offered are safe and meet EU standards. For any product safety related inquiries or concerns, please contact our EU representative at gpsr@sindenventures.com. You can also write to us at 123 Main Street, Anytown, Country or Markou Evgenikou 11, Mesa Geitonia, 4002, Limassol, Cyprus.